04 August 2007

On Perfection

I am not perfect.

The topic of perfection came to mind via two events: A huge work I recently performed that, with thousands of tiny bits incrementally performed over the course of over ten hours, was negated for a single error; I also consider the ongoing plight of my teen-aged daughter, now at the stage of life where she expects too much of herself.

Perhaps there is no answer in either case, but I try to understand.

I recall a Led Zeppelin concert on Thursday 23 October 1969. While I was unfazed, friends publicly decried the "different" sounds of the live band.

Having been a recording and performing drummer for years (and for years to come), I knew that produced music (then and now) is incrementally assembled. One "lays down tracks" --a best effort-- and then works hours to remove or replace imperfect portions one at a time.

However, my friends could only spread the word that the Zeppelin concert was nasty.

Again, I understood. This was the first time Zeppelin had played the Boston Gardens (prior to that they'd simply done the intimate Boston Tea Party-- about 500 people). At my own concerts, I knew it was all we could do to balance the mix-- hall dynamics, reverberation, amplification all changed the timbre of the drum sound... not to mention the difficulty of stage-replicating precise settings of fuzz boxes, compressors, equalization, and even imitating layers of vocals laid down in the studio by the same person!

But two decades later, in Japan in 1993 I ruminated, "Everywhere I look I am surrounded by perfection. Perfect paintings, perfect orchestrations, perfect vocalists, perfect artistry, perfect rock bands...

"We live in an astounding world of perfection and humanities. Russian operas, symphony orchestras, background rock music for games, classic and renaissance paintings, movies, faces, bodies, cinematography, cartoonists, writers, performances, hand-made jewelry creations, jingles─ the television constantly heralds a stream of one perfect achievement after another.

"But what can I do that is perfect? If someone were to come up and take inventory, what could I do that is unique, awesome, or flawless?

"I don't know. Some things I do (I think) may come close, but most don't even register. Is this a question for which most people will not know their own answer? Are [humans] supposed to do one thing perfectly?

"Maybe the answer is more to be found in the story of Vincent Van Gogh─ not in the part about his suicide─ but in that he sought for perfect expression of what was inside, yet could not express it to his satisfaction. The frustration of what he considered imperfect paintings sentenced himself to death to end the pain.

"Yet his 'imperfect' paintings top every list..." I wrote almost 15 years ago.

Without moralizing further, I'd simply say that things haven't changed all that much for humankind. People still irrationally expect perfection-- both in performance of others and by their own delivery:

...My "one mistake" amongst thousands of corrections in 2007 cost innocents honest earnings.
...Led Zeppelin's concerts disillusioned many in 1969 because the band didn't sound like their recordings.
...In 1890 Van Gogh (then 37) shot each and every one of us to death in a small way.

The sickness of irrational hopes of perfection (in others) kills everyone a little bit every day.

And you? From whom do you expect perfection today?

SeriousLee